Averoigne II:9, Being the Testimony of Conrad of Nurnburg, of the Order of Saint Dominic, Inquisitor-General in the Service of the Blessed Innocent V, before the Cathedral Council of Vyones in the Archbishopric of Averoigne

Thy Excellency, honored canons and priests, deacons and subdeacons, guildmasters and burghers of the cathedral-city of Vyones, it is a privilege to stand before thee today.  I greatly wish it were under other circumstances.

I must state at the beginning that I am no man skilled in the niceties of the law, having devoted all my life to the study of Holy Scripture and the saints and martyrs who have commented thereon, that my soul might be edified and purified for the work ahead of me and the glorification of the Most High.  As with the Apostles, I have given no thought to what I should say as I came before thee today.  If my cause be just, let the Almighty put the words in my mouth that I might reveal the justice and righteousness of my actions unto thee.

It may indeed be that I am guilty of a misstep, a mistake in judicial procedure.  If so, I am grieved of my error, and do deeply repent of it.  Allow me to tell all of thee what hath occurred.

As thou knowest regarding inquisitorial procedure, it is common procedure to send before me into a territory various individuals, motivated by a zeal for their faith, who will listen and speak to determine where the vile weed of heresy hath taken root.  During their missions, it came to the attention of one of these brave souls – would that I could give his name, that he might be honored!  But nay, he hath given up praise on earth for glory in Heaven – that a foul plot was afoot.  A secretive cabal of Satanists, heretics, and other blasphemers lurked here, yeah, even under the eaves of thy great cathedral.  Further, these malefactors already had implemented a foul scheme to deliver a concoction brewed out of unholy substances unto certain, unnamed, individuals in my community.

What occupied me immediately was the identity of their intended victims.  Based on scanty information, I had no idea where to begin, save for my modest knowledge of the ways of those who love the darkness.  Those who are most foul, I reasoned, always seek to strike against those who are most holy, in the bosom of our Lord.  Who but Thy Excellency, or those close to thee, was their logical target?

At a time like this, a man must act quickly.  I knew this – I had been told the identity of one of the conspirators, as well as where she had hit the vile mithridate.  Men were at my disposal, and every moment was a risk that these blackguards might slip away.  I acted, and I acted quickly, out of love for God, for the love of Vyones, and for the love of Thy Excellency.  And it is an act that has borne fruit, as we have seen.

Nonetheless, I am but a poor, sinful man.  I have agonized over this, and while my confession has been taken and penance done, uncertainty still fills me that I have done what is right.  In the future, I vow to consult with my notary before such an action is undertaken.  In the meantime, we quibble over fine points of the law while two more doses of that horrible potion are hidden somewhere in Vyones.  I say, let those who oppose me go after these traitors with ten times the zeal, and we will soon root out the bad seed that has infested this city and render it clean in the eyes of God.

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Published in: on April 13, 2008 at 9:32 pm  Comments (1)  

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One CommentLeave a comment

  1. rhetoric = chilling, in a scary-good-pleasing way!


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